Anxiety Riddled Brain

People, sometimes I have no idea how to think. It’s like a curse. I’m aware of it, or at least a part of me knows. But I believe I can speak for everyone with anxiety: it’s gotta be hard to be close to us. I don’t want to fill my head with worries, because I know there won’t be room for anything else. This is something I work on constantly. I try my best to be the best version of myself, but times there is this terrifying and crippling anxiety that holds me back. Which is the thought that something is holding me back.

 

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Here are 5 things I want to share that people with anxiety don’t know how to tell our friends and family.

  1. It doesn’t define us.

    To some who may have anxiety,  it may be a part of us. But so are our passions, our quirks, our personalities. Anxiety is one of numerous parts of us. We still appreciate food, love, art, sunny days, and rainy days.

  2. Can’t turn it off. I wish.

    I don’t want to focus on the negatives, or what could go wrong. I don’t want to bring down to mood. There’s no way I’m trying to get attention.

  3. Never try to talk to us about our emotions.

    Never tell someone with anxiety that our worries don’t exist, or we can get over it if we just stop thinking about it. All that make’s us feel like, is that we’re broken. Trying to relieve us of our fear or sadness might be a good idea, but there’s a fine line, to try to combat that irrational part of us that us constantly afraid.

  4. We’re aware of our fears aren’t rational, but we can’t shake off the part that doesn’t

    It can be so embarrassing, when it really isn’t, we know how ridiculous it sounds, when said aloud. But that’s the part that always reminds us with anxiety, “What if this time, my worries are correct?”

  5. We’re grateful for what we have – and for you.

    Believe it or not, many of us are pretty optimistic between anxiety spurts. We do love our life, and are grateful for what we have, especially for our loved ones. We don’t mean to focus on the negatives, but we can’t help it. My closest love ones, are the ones who try their hardest to understand, who knows us in and out and still willing to stay.

 

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Hikes, Runs, and 20lbs Down

I’ve FINALLY hit the 20lb mark of my fitness journey!! I can’t believe it!! In the beginning of my fitness journey it was nearly impossible for me to see the end results. Sit-up’s were difficult, 2min planks were painful, but one thing that was for sure was I was definitely able to see the end results of my workouts. While I work out, I overlook my exercises on what I have to do. 10 minute warm ups of 2min toe taps, planks, hamstring stretches, and calve raises. I also oversee my morning route for my run. Weather, I’m doing 3miles or 6miles, I make sure I stick with that assigned route and complete it with 100%. I usually stick with my neighborhood boroughs. I know the amount of sets/miles I have to accomplish, and in my head I begin to visualize what I will feel and look like at the end of that workout.

20lbs Down

Current weight June 18th, 2015

Along with running everyday, putting in my miles, working out, lifting weights, and eating alot more healthier and leaner; I also keep busy with combing my workouts with setting a date or outing with my friends and family.  This past week I kept busy running trails with my son (in the jogging stroller of course) hiked with my cousin who recently moved back to the Bay Area, and also hiked up Mission Peak with a local Canadian YouTube star, who coincidentally moved in a couple blocks from my parents house.

Here’s a short recap of the East Bay Regional Parks I’ve currently been checking out. All are within a short couple miles drive from my house. It’s pretty amazing. I’m undoubtedly, without question keeping in within my morning run/hike routine and putting it on rotation.

Don Edwards

Don Edwards San Francisco Bay National Wildlife Refuge is located in the southern part of San Francisco, Bay Are, The Refuge headquarters and visitor center is located in the Baylands district of Fremont next to Coyote Hills Regional Park, here in Alameda County.

I’ve been to Don Edwards multiple times already within the 2 weeks of the month, and I absolutely love it! It has a great view of the marshlands and SF, though it is a bit tainted by the traffic of the Dumbarton bridge (bridge connecting Fremont to Palo Alto). The trail that I frequent is very short, but it is pretty. Overall, its a quiet park. There are a few attractions, but the flat trail that extends out the marshland is so long! Definitely a great trail for trail runners!!

(Some parts of smell kinda funky, but what can you say, Its nature!)

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Coyote Hills

Coyote Hills Regional Park is on the southeast shore of the San Francisco Bay. The Coyote Hills themselves are a small range of hills at the edge of the bay; though not reaching any great height, they afford tremendous views of the bay, three of the trans-bay bridges (Dumbarton, San Mateo Bridge, and the Bay Bridge), the cities of San Francisco and Oakland, the Peninsula Range of the Santa Cruz Mountains and Mount Tamalpais.

Its a light hike, if you are trying to get slowly getting into shape. Also, its a lovely hike, with a beautiful view… But since I’ve been quite active, I decided to do the higher and intense hikes, along with my jogging overland stroller. Luckily, I went with my cousin, who was able to help push up the jogging stroller (45lb stroller with my 4yr old 30lbish son. A rough total of 80lbs!) up the steep inclines. There are so many different routes for you to take to see depending on how adventurous you’d like to be that day – its amazing!! I certainly plan to go back!!

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Mission Peak

I’ve been to Mission Peak a handful of times, but I’m always down to do it with first timers. My trip with time around was with a girl named DebraMaye. Our story meeting is quite different from any other. This Mission Peak hike was maybe one of our first one on one meet-ups ever.  If you’re familiar with YouTube and the beginning of make-up gurus, Debra was one of the starting originals. Native Canadian from Calgary, I messaged her 4 years ago as a fan, and also reaching out to her promoting my small business of event styling at the time. Later down the road, she ended up moving in with her now husband she now reached out to me asking for help style her special day this upcoming September. So for combining a wedding meeting, and also my morning cardio I offered her to hike Mission Peak with me as a first time for herself now as an Californian.

Mission PeakAt the tip-top of Mission Peak.

Mission Peak is a public park that borders and overlooks the Silicon Valley. It is very popular with local hikers, bicyclists, sightseers and tourists from beyond for its vista and strenuous climb. It’s a full six-mile (10km) round-trip. The “Mission Peeker” marker pole at the top is the most famous geo-tagged landmark of Fremont. You can check out my last visit to Mission Peak HERE.
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DebraMaye & I at the “Mission-Peeker”

Flag Hill

Sunol Regional Wilderness is one of the best hiking locales in the East Bay hills northeast of Silicon Valley. This Flag Hill Loop is one of the best ways to see Sunol. This loop is relatively short at 3.7 miles, but it’s no cakewalk: Flag Hill summit is 1.3 miles and 900 feet above the Sunol headquarters. It’s a tough climb. The view from the top is one of the best in the Bay Area, well worth the climb. In springtime, the hills are popping with California poppies and many more wildflowers.

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So, if anyone asks how did the I get the weight off? Look above. I fill my week with active running, and hiking. Everyday. No excuses.

The most memorable days usually end with the dirtiest clothes right? Get sweaty. Get fit.

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29 and Feeling GREAT!!

The last year of my twenties is finally here. I’ve prepared myself the last couple months for this. I’ve grown from the beginning of February until now. With a huge leap of faith,  having trust in myself, and will power; all has definitely gotten me through so many metal and physical challenges the last few months. From creating my little segment of my Journey To 30, I’ve decided to document the last few years of my 20s. As I’ve mentioned early on the past months, 28 wasn’t so great. From being unhappy my myself mentally and physically – I’ve decided to step out of that darkness I once was in. I want to create a woman I am proud of, and be proud of.

I’ve realized over the course of the last few months, you can have whatever you want in life. It just takes the right timing, the right mindset, and the willingness to risk it all. Put in your all, you can have whatever you want. Seriously, the hard work pays of. Stepping into my last year of my twenties was perfectly timed as I’ve ended my last contract with my trainer. The warm-up is over, and the true test begins. The real challenge awaits, and only I can conquer it. While soaking up every bit of knowledge my trainer has provided for me, I’ve decided to continue my health fitness journey without him (which was really hard), and achieve my goal weight on my own. So far, I’m doing great!!!

All with the proper nutrition, sticking with my fitness regimen, putting in my miles every single day, and surrounding myself with like minded positive people is all I need. I’ve found my balance with myself, household chores, being patient with the children, and having healthy direct communication with my boyfriend as well as my friends and family. With all of this aligned, I can only point fingers to all the hard work and effort I had put in with being healthy and fit. When you put in the hard work, everything comes clear and balanced. No joke. It’s pretty amazing how it all falls into place.

Turning 29 hasn’t scared me a bit. I may be 29, but I feel like I’m in a 23 year olds body!!!

Cheers to the last year of my twenties!!

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